I just finished watching the 2011 MTV Movie Awards, and I gotta say they lived up to my expectations. Good thing I never have high expectations for these lame-ass awards.
Yes, I am a movie snob. Guilty! But I also enjoy fluffy popcorn movies, except the really crappy ones. And with that, here are my pros and cons for this award show.
- Funny opening bit, with host Jason Sudeikis spoofing The Hangover Part II. I think Justin Bartha has more screen time in this than he does in both Hangover movies combined.
- Sudeikis had an excellent, funny, sharp opening comedic monologue. He worked the crowd and made some very funny Arnold-baby-maid jokes perfectly. Chelsea Handler could learn a thing or two.
- The Timberlake-Kunis chemistry was white hot! I’d almost go see Friends With Benefits now.
- Awesome new trailers/promos for Super 8 and Fright Night. I was already seeing both, but these new clips really got my movie blood pumping.
- Classic Jim Carrey. You can always count on him to bring the funny to the MTV Movie Awards.
- Bob The Boulder is a star in the making and he is already a better actor than Taylor Lautner.
- I said two years ago that Emma Stone was the next big thing. She continues to prove me right. Loved her comic timing tonight.
- I’m going to give the Twilight peeps some credit (only time it will happen). RPattz and Shark Boy kissing was some damn good humorous improv. The two have more raw sexually chemistry together than either of them do with KStew.
- Reese Witherspoon getting some weird lifetime award did class the event up a bit. Robert Pattinson was either drunk or stoned during the whole thing. But I did love him dropping the F bomb. RPattz Is growing on me.
- Between Sudeikis and Pattinson, the awards kinda had a celeb roast feel to them. Always good to keep the crowd on its toes.
- I’m not sure what I am more confused about? People who think Chelsea Handler is funny? Or how Chelsea Handler is only 36?!?! While idiots wanted to see President Obama’s birth certificate, I think we should have instead looked into Handler’s birth records. Long form please!
- Taylor Lautner. C’mon man! The dude has a gym membership. Congrats!
- I couldn’t tell if the nominees for Best Actor were the same names on the list of last years Worst Actor for the Razzies. With the exceptation of Jesse Eisenberg.
- MTV shoving this Teen Wolf show down my throat. Michael J. Fox is Teen Wolf! Hell, even Jason Bateman is Teen Wolf Too!
- I’m no fashion expert, but Ryan Gosling looked like a guy auditioning for the West Hollywood Musical Theater version of The Rocky Horror Picture Show.
- I hate knowing who will win by just looking at the audience and seeing who showed up. 5 nominees, usually only 1 or 2 show up.
- Instead of random musical performances, why not have a Best Song category? Then have the performances from the nominated songs. Too Oscar-ish?
- Justin Bieber. Wow dude! I think the weakest member from WHAM could kick your ass.
- Twilight. They are running out of books, right? For the love of all that is good and decent in this world, please tell me these movies will end soon!
- Black Swan loses Best Kiss? Really? Did guys forget to vote for this one?
- Hey remember Natalie Portman’s brave, daring, brilliant performance in Black Swan? Well, it was crap next to Kristen Stewart’s performance as Bella. The people have spoken.
- That new trailer for the next Twilight movie should have been nominated for Best Comedic Performance.
- You know how the Oscars usually have an amazing actor hand out Best Picture? DeNiro, Nicholson, Pacino, etc. The MTV Movie Awards had Gary Busey give out Best Movie.
- According to the viewers who voted for the MTV Movie Awards: Twilight is a better movie than Inception, Black Swan and The Social Network. I weep for the future.
Ok, I need to end this before I slash my wrists with my 127 Hours promotional penknife. I leave you with the full list of “winners” from the show. Oh and btw… HEY MTV START PLAYING MUSIC VIDEOS AGAIN!!!
Lights, Camera, ACTSEAN!
- Winners from the 20th annual MTV Movie Awards:
• Best Movie: “The Twilight Saga: Eclipse.”
• Best Male Performance: Robert Pattinson, “The Twilight Saga: Eclipse.”
• Best Female Performance: Kristen Stewart, “The Twilight Saga: Eclipse.”
• Best Comedic Performance: Emma Stone, “Easy A.”
• Best Breakout Star: Chloe Grace Moretz, “Kick-Ass.”
• Biggest Badass Star: Chloe Grace Moretz, “Kick-Ass.”
• Best Villain: Tom Felton, “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1.”
• Best Jaw Dropping Moment: Justin Bieber, “Justin Bieber: Never Say Never.”
• Best Line from a Movie: “I want to get chocolate wasted,” Alexys Nycole Sanchez, “Grown Ups.”
• Best Scared-as-S–t Performance: Ellen Page, “Inception.”