Sucks To Be Spitzer
Wednesday, March 19th, 2008
Once upon a time, there was a call girl named Ashley Alexandra Dupree, aka Kristen. Her dream career is to be a musician. Instead, she decides the next best thing is to take calls from horny, ugly men.
She satisfied many-a man, including a married politician. Hey, the man has notoriety. Wouldn’t you? Ish.
Married politician gets busted.
Call girl gets media attention.
People download her music.
Married politician steps down.
GGW creator Joe Francis offers $1Mil paycheck to pose in a spread and ride the GGW bus.
Married politician sits at home and cries while his career, family, and everything else pretty much sucks.
Instead of using Kleenex for wiping off his ding-dong, he uses it to wipe his tears.
GGW Joe takes back his offer of $1Mil since “Kristen” was found already living in the GGW vault of videos.
Everyone knows the politician’s face. By now, Eliot Spitzer is living on the streets begging for change.
“Kristen” will more than likely never have to sucky sucky for cash again. This bitch is set for life. Book deals, magazine deals, reality TV, perhaps?
Funny how the tables can quickly be turned.
Sucks to be Spitzer.
