Jessica Simpson | Danity Donnaly

Meg Ryan Gets Lifetime Achievement Award.

Sunday, November 30th, 2008

I know some of you are thinking you may be seeing double or read the said title wrong…but I wanted to let you know that no, you aren’t going blind and yes, you can read. Meg Ryan DID get honored with a lifetime achievement award. One very important fact must be delivered to you though. The honor was presented to Ryan by the Germans. Now, I must point out to you that I have nothing against individuals of the German culture…however, they do have taste that is questionable.

Aren’t they the same peeps who made Jessica Simpson’s flick “Major Movie Star” number one? I could be wrong, but to give Meg Ryan a lifetime achievement award is like giving Britney Spears a Grammy. It’s just downright awkward.

My reasoning is either: A–They really do *heart* Meg Ryan and believe the fake orgasm scene in “Harry Met Sally” was Oscar potential and presented this Bambi award to her as recognition 10 years later; or B—They think Meg Ryan sucks big time and by giving her a Lifetime Achievement Award maybe she will take that as a hint to take her award and throw in the acting towel; or C–They confused the Megster with fellow tight-foreheaded Nicole Kidman. My guess is the latter.

A spokesperson told the Daily Express, “Meg Ryan is among the most attractive, talented and successful female stars that Hollywood ever produced.”

“Her smile is irresistible, her comedic talent delightful and her performance in ‘When Harry Met Sally’ unforgettable.”

Ok, what I would like to know is who is in charge of selecting the award recipients?

Image Source: Wire Image

The Many Faces Of Kellie Dill Pickler At Last Night’s CMA’s.

Thursday, November 13th, 2008

All you honky-tonkin’ fans who tuned into the biggest night in country music last night KNOW that it was a night full of not-so-many-surprises. Although, by pure observation, adding Kellie Pickler to the country music mix sure adds a trashy appeal that I never thought I would see in the genre in MY LIFETIME. Anypushupbraandplasticsurgery…

Kenny Chesney took home his third straight “Entertainer of the Year” trophy, while Carrie Underwood took the Best Female Artist award. Too bad Jessica Simpson didn’t even get an invite so that she could cop a listen to what REAL country music sounds like. Anytwang, here is a list of the winners from last night’s big show.

ENTERTAINER OF THE YEAR
Kenny Chesney

MALE VOCALIST OF THE YEAR
Brad Paisley

FEMALE VOCALIST OF THE YEAR
Carrie Underwood

VOCAL GROUP OF THE YEAR
Rascal Flatts

VOCAL DUO OF THE YEAR
Sugarland

NEW ARTIST OF THE YEAR
Lady Antebellum

ALBUM OF THE YEAR
Troubadour
George Strait

SINGLE OF THE YEAR
“I Saw God Today”
George Strait

SONG OF THE YEAR
“Stay”
Jennifer Nettles

MUSICAL EVENT OF THE YEAR
Robert Plant and Alison Krauss
“Gone Gone Gone (Done Moved On)”

MUSIC VIDEO OF THE YEAR
“Waitin’ On a Woman”
Brad Paisley featuring Andy Griffith
Directed by Jim Shea and Peter Tilden

MUSICIAN OF THE YEAR
Mac McAnally - Guitar

Click for more pics from last night’s show, including some of my favorite Kellie Dill Pickler faces. That beotch gives me the LOL’s.
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Carrie Underwood: One Elle Of A Girl.

Tuesday, November 4th, 2008

Carrie Underwood is one of the classiest women in the music industry today. There is no doubt that Carrie will have staying power as her talent is real and her attitude is focused on the task at hand. Miss Underwood graces the cover of the December issue of Elle and dishes on rumors, that other blonde, and life on the road. Here are some of the highlights:

On the rumor she was dating Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps:

“I swear on everything, on my job, on my house, my dog…That’s how serious I am. It’s all just a lie. Anytime any [media source] ever says ‘a friend said,’ or ‘a close’ whatever – no, they didn’t! It’s just made up. None of my friends would say anything. Ever. About anything!”

On her comment that a taken Tony Romo still calls her:

“It was just something that was said in passing, and I would never mean to say anything to hurt anybody or to stir up anything, because I’m just not about drama. At all. I might be mad too if somebody said my boyfriend was calling some other girl. So I can definitely see where she [Jessica Simpson] would be coming from. But I haven’t talked to him since, like, May.”

On whether or not she’s dating someone:

“If I say I am or I’m not, as soon as this magazine comes out, it might be the opposite of what I tell you now. In three months, it’ll be ‘Carrie said she’s not dating anybody,’ yet last night, I was out on the town with some guy. He’s going to get mad at me. Everybody’s going to think I’m a liar. It’s just best not to go there.”

On life on the road:

“I don’t know how people do it. It’s tiring. It’s hard. Right now I do a lot because I have no reason not to. I don’t have a husband or kids. If I go home, I’m home by myself. I have no reason not to be on the road, no reason not to just get out there and do everything right now, while I’m young enough to, while I can enjoy it. But I think when I get a little older, I definitely want to slow down, just because it’s very stressful. It’s hard on your body, hard on your mind, hard on your emotions.”

On dealing with celebrity:

“I knew what I was signing up for, and I’m not complaining at all. I’ve learned how to deal with it, and my life is great, I’m a happy person. What are you going to do? Give it all up? No!”

Click after the jump for more pics of Carrie from the photo shoot.
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It Sucks To Be Ken Paves.

Monday, November 3rd, 2008

“Jessica Simpson’s rep has confirmed the singer’s hairstylist Ken Paves was rushed to the hospital early Sunday morning after being injured by paparazzi. … As Simpson and her entourage were leaving L.A. eatery Madeo, they were mobbed by photographers. In the madness, one snapper hit Paves near his eye with a part of a camera, leaving him with blood trickling down his face.” Damn. It sure doesn’t sound worth it to be Chestica’s BFF! Where in big-pimpin-gold-chain is Papa Joe when you need him???

This Just In: Jessica To Ruin Rascal Flatts Tour Experience.

Thursday, October 2nd, 2008

Just when I thought I’d buy tickets to see the Rascal Flatts, I need to seriously reconsider. I just logged into my myspace account and the first thing I see is one of Jessica’s 10 fans promoting this news in a bulletin. I about choked on my diet coke.

Breaking News! Jessica Simpson to tour with Rascal Flatts

Multi-platinum selling group Rascal Flatts announced plans today to continue their sold-out “Bob That Head Tour” into 2009. The 2008 leg will wrap up November 2, after a two-day play in Uncasville, Connecticut at Mohegan Sun. “Bob That Head Tour” winter 2009 dates will launch in mid-January and will run with approximately 25 shows. Dates, cities and on-sales will be announced later this fall. Epic/Columbia Nashville’s Jessica Simpson will open the 2009 “Bob That Head Tour” shows.

Jessica Simpson grew up with a mix of musical influences, and while it was her multi-Platinum pop success that introduced her to countless fans, it was country music where she found her heart. The release of her Epic/Columbia Nashville debut country album, Do You Know, was met with a resounding cheer, debuting at 1 on Billboard’s Top Country Albums chart and launching Jessica’s first country hit, “Come on Over.” It’s one of eight songs she co-wrote for the album, which also includes her new single, “Remember That,” and the title track, featuring friend and hero, Dolly Parton. Acknowledging her roots as a country girl, Jessica has said, “I took the long way around to get back to where I came from,” but with Do You Know, she’s truly found her home.”

Do I REALLY want to see THIS…LIVE?

Forget it, I’m already feeling nauseous. I think I’ll pass.

I’m wondering how much Papa Joe had to pay these guys to allow her to take the stage before them. Of course he wanted her to perform on an already SOLD OUT tour. And, how fitting would a “Bob Your Head” tour be for Chestica?

Well…I’ll let you figure that one out…

Image Source: Wire Image

Jessica Simpson Is Still Obsessed With Tony Romo.

Friday, September 19th, 2008

Whether you like it or not, the Papa Joe puppet and wanna-be Dolly Parton known as Jessica Simpson has the number one country record. Yeah, boo hiss. But, who cares about that? All Jessica seems to flap her jaw about is her gomer-looking boyfriend, Tony Romo. Come on, it ISN’T ALL about the music.

“Tony is a great quarterback, but he’s a better boyfriend,” Simpson tells People. “I’m seriously proud of myself for letting him into my life.” Translation: I’m so glad my Papa Joe arranged this relationship for me. He didn’t have to pay him too much either. At least I don’t think so. Hee Hee.

Claiming that she’s tough to be around — “I toot under the sheets, I spend a lot of money and I can belch the ABCs” — she says she’s thankful for her Cowboy. “Through all the chaos and torment and everything I go through, I can lay in his arms and finally rest,” she says. Ummm…ok, then. I think she forgot to mention that poor Tony has to wear a gas mask every night he goes to bed too. Sounds like it’s the chaos and torment SHE puts Tony through that she needs to worry about. Good grief.

Anytoot, Jessica performed last night for charity, helping to raise money for the Rape Crisis Center in Las Vegas. Click after the jump for Jessica’s best John Mayer impersonations. Damn, sometimes I wish they would have stayed together and performed together on stage. That would have been one sweet moment full of goofy facial expressions. Oh. Well.
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A Man In Apron.

Thursday, September 11th, 2008

nicklachey

Many say they love a man in uniform and while that may be true, I must admit…seeing Nick Lachey wearing this white apron kinda takes my breath away. Holy Hotness! Not to downplay the apron, but I’m pretty sure Nick could wear a clown suit and still be effing sexy…red squishy nose and all. But, this apron really takes the cake. Vanessa Manillo, you are one lucky beotch!

And while Nick’s ex Jessica Simpson has been making a damn fool of herself publicly (pretty much every damn day) ever since their brutal divorce, Nick has been dedicating his time (as of late) to the less fortunate.

On Tuesday, Nicky volunteered his time at the Food Bank For New York City’s Community Kitchen in Harlem. Thus, the apron. There will be sweet dreams for me tonight!

Jessica Simpson Calls Carrie Underwood A Liar.

Monday, August 25th, 2008

Carrie Underwood recently told Allure magazine that her ex Tony Romo still calls her occasionally. Carrie was quoted as saying, â€œThe phone will ring and itâ€™ll be him, and Iâ€™ll maybe not answer.â€ Hmmm, late night chit chats? Coffee talk? Why, oh why would Tony possibly call Carrie? Pfffft. Surprised? I’m not.

But, ‘no way, Jose’ is what Jessica Simpson is saying.
In an interview with a Nashville radio station, Simpson attempted to put those rumors to rest, once and for all!

â€œTony and I both laughed at that,â€ Jessica told the Woody and Jim show. â€œYeah, we got a chuckle out of it.â€ The actress-singer then joked that she even â€œlooked at his call logâ€ just to make sure, before adding, â€œIâ€™m kidding! Iâ€™m not that girl!â€ Mmmhmmm. Sure you aren’t, Jessica!

Let’s not forget…she’s THAT girl who thought Chicken of The Sea was really chicken.

The only reason why Tony is laughing is because he is doing a good job hiding the truth!

Jessica Wants To Bust Out Like Dolly!

Friday, August 15th, 2008

Whether you like it or not, prepare to see more and more and more of Jessica Simpson…only we will be seeing the country-bumpkin side of Jessica. You ready, ya’ll? Jessica is preparing for her country album titled “Do You Know” to be released September 8th. I’m not sure what it is what we are supposed to know, but the mystery of not knowing what she wants us to know is just Jessica’s sneaky way of tricking us into dishing out some dough for her pockets. (One thing I do KNOW is that Papa Joe is working behind-the-scenes developing a sneaky PR stunt to whip out at us…sneaky fox that he is…Sneaky, sneaky Papa Joe.)

Oh, and don’t be surprised if along the promotional tour you see Jessica pull some Dolly Parton’s.

Jess told a source, “Dolly is awesome! I idolize her. And she is beautiful. I would love to be just like her. I have worked with her and it was great.”

That’s ALL we need is another Dolly Parton.

Pam Anderson Is Still A Ho-Bag.

Wednesday, August 13th, 2008

In a very desperate attempt to save her reality show, “Pam On The Loose”, Pam decided to prance around in a white t-shirt….and oh, oops…got it wet….because what better way to get attention, right?

She may have called Jessica Simpson a “bitch and a whore”, but geez, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

Pam needs to go away and take care of her Hepatitis C. I’m just patiently waiting for the announcement of her reality show to be nixed.