Despite Papa Jamie’s leash on Brit Brit and helping her get her feet pointed in the right direction, Brit Brit is sad. A bag of Cheetos and a frappe always helps me cope with the day to day hoopla of being a gossip blogger.

If you didn’t watch the much-anticipated Brit documentary, you didn’t miss a whole lot. The revelations weren’t shocking and there was no mention of Adnan, Psycho Sam Lufti, or the whacked out pink wig episodes. C’mon you KNOW you wanted to hear about that Cheeto-ness. I did.

What I got out of the whole one hour jibber jabber was that despite Papa Jamie helping her with shiznit, Brit Brit wants to be free from the conservatorship and wants to be free to search for that new gold-digging husband.

One of the most disturbing quotes from Cheeto Brit’s mouth was one which she told her friends,
‘I’m going to write the man of my dreams on my arm. I’m going to get married next year and have babies. Watch!” Ummm okay. Somehow I don’t think this beotch has learned.

‘You can’t really go there in a complete state of happiness because you’re scared it’s going to be taken away. So it’s better just not to feel anything at all and to have hope to feel the other way….When I tell people the way I feel they hear me, but they’re really not listening. They hear what they want to hear. They don’t really listen to what I’m telling them.

She started to sob as she added: “It’s bad. I’m sad.”

The truth of the matter is that Brit Brit has had ALL the chances and possibilities to have a great life, but because she is ignorant right now, she is just a cow who is being milked for mad Cheeto money. Because her comeback performances have been nothing to write home about, I’m thinking girlfriend needs to disappear off the radar. Earn her kids back and just leave. The end.

Click after the jump for pics of Brit in London, greeting fans and smiling that Cheetorific smile. BTW, isn’t that the balcony Michael Jackson dangled Blanket from?
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Well, so much for going back to the wifey and kids. Balthazar Getty must have gotten a tad jealous when Sienna Miller took to the clubs to get her hoochie on…because now…it seems the two have reunited for some boot knockin’.

If you can recall, just two weeks ago Sienna told friends that their relationship was over when she returned to London alone after Mr. Getty refused to divorce his wife. So, does THIS mean that a divorce is in progress or is this just some makeup hoochie coo?

Image Source: Rex Features

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Rumor has it that Brad and his guido-stache sneezed on Saint Angelina’s trout pout and one of her eggs got fertilized. Yep…again.

InTouch magazine broke the news that Saint Ange and Brad are preggers once again, which has forced the stick-like figure to come forward with the big ‘ole denial. You knew that was coming. If you recall, when InTouch broke the news of the messiahs being conceived last year, Saint Ange denied the pregnancy despite sporting a belly the size of a basketball.

InTouch claims that the actress announced the happy news to a waiter in a London restaurant after he tried to pour her an alcoholic drink.

However, Geyer Kosinski, Angelina’s voice, told Usweekly.com the claims are “not true.” So, is Saint Ange really pregnant again or is this just one of those big fat rumors? I guess the belly won’t lie.

I hereby declare from this day forward a Saint Angelina Belly Watch.

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Perhaps fate is keeping Cracky and her trophy husband Blake Fielder-Civil from seeing each other?

Yesterday, Amy packed an overnight bag, some cigarettes and her weave mice to visit her rehab-residing hubby Blake. However, Miss Cracky didn’t leave her home early enough to make it to the Life Works rehab center in time for visiting hours. THAT SUCKS!

Knowing she would not make it in time, Amy decided to hop in a taxi to try to make the reunion happen anyways. However, just after FIVE minutes of cruising in the cab, Amy must have told the cabbie to bring her back home. I’m sure her little weave mice were NOT happy campers…all dressed up and nowhere to go.

The mother of Amy’s goddaughter Dionne Bromfield told a source, “I don’t think Amy’s going to leave the house today. Things aren’t going great between [her and Blake] at the moment.”

Next time she needs to maybe go sans the eyeliner or start caking on that shiznit a lot earlier! I hope she fed those weave mice some special cheese when she got home.

Maybe today Wino will make it to the rehab center on time?

Image Source: ISOImages

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And breaks his leg after falling 40ft down two flights of stairs. Ummmm, ouch.

Just when things seem to SLOWLY get better (career-wise) for Jesse Metcalfe, he is once again set back.

The desperate ex-Desperate Housewives star hosted the World Music Awards in Monte Carlo, France, on Sunday but fell down and slipped as he headed back to his hotel to change. We know accidents happen, but man he must have been a tad too excited to get to an after-party! Wowsers.

According to a source, Mr. Smooth Move was rushed to the hospital where he was then flown to London to be re-examined. An MRI brain scan gave him the all-clear, however, doctors confirmed he had fractured his fibula.

Jesse’s publicist released a statement, “Jesse knows he’s had a very lucky escape. The accident could have been fatal.”

Well, let’s hope this is a lesson learned for Messy Jesse. And, despite how annoying we think he is, we do wish him well and hope his eyebrows are leg is okay!

Image Source: BIG

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It’s been a long, hard few weeks for the children of Guy Ritchie and Madge the Vadge, but at last Rocco and David Banda have been reunited with their father. This morning at the London airport, it was a sight that would make anybody’s heart melt.

An onlooker described the emotional reunion, “Rocco shouted, “Dad!” in the loudest voice. Both he and David were smiling. Guy literally threw his coffee aside to free up his hands and run over. You could tell they were all so excited to see each other.”

Those poor little kids. They are the ones that are going to be suffering in the end. Let’s just hope Madge the Vadge doesn’t use her children as pawns in this already nasty divorce. You know Madge is probably relieved to be free for a few days…which means some sneaky-on-the-down-low sexy time with her new boy toy Alex Rodriguez.

Image Source: Matrix Photos

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Big kudos goes out to Lily Allen for actually trying to look good for the GQ 20th Anniversary party in London last night. Cute curly ringlets presumably created by Amy Winehouse’s stylist…hot pink lipstick…the snazzy strapless black dress…other than the messed up makeup job, there was one major problem….

Holy moly!

Good thing she had a whole ‘nother dress to change into….although maybe it would have been easier to just change into a different pair of hooker tights? Oh well.

There’s no if’s, and’s or butts about it….a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do!

Image Source: Matrix

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Never mess with a girl in leather. In fact, I’m not even too sure I want to bash Posh’s ensemble publicly, due to the fact that Poshy might hunt me down and whip me with a leather belt. How freaky would that be?

Anyspank, perhaps Posh was on her way to some biker chick meeting of the minds? We’re not quite sure… but what we DO know is that Poshy left Los Angeles for London yesterday looking serious and crabby as a mofo’.

Image Source: Splash

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Comedian Sarah Silverman was heckled on stage during her UK stand-up debut in London. Fans, who had paid about $100 a ticket slow-hand clapped and shouted they wanted their money back after the star’s short 40-minute set. After the audience refused to leave, Silverman was forced to give a Q&A session as an encore after admitting she had no other material prepared. Unimpressed fans shouted ‘you’re over-hyped Sarah’ and ‘I’ve seen longer clips on YouTube’, before the star told the audience to ‘go home’ and the left the stage.

The Daily Telegraph’s Dominic Cavendish described the comic as ’skipping away in near-disgrace’ after the ‘excruciatingly embarrassing’ question and answer session.

Wow, “tough” crowd!

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Actress Billie Piper popped out a baby boy at the private Portland Hospital in London. Husband Laurence Fox was also present for the said-to-be cesarean birth. A name for the baby boy has not yet been released.

Congrats to the happy couple! We wish the family good luck, especially with the whole lack of sleep aspect. Ha!

Image Source: BIG

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