She may have just endured a late night of celebrating, but that doesn’t stop newly 50-year-old Madonna from getting her booty up and heading to the gym. Talk about dedication!

According to an insider, Madonna’s party was a riotous affair at London club Volstead, organized by her sweet husband Guy Ritchie.

Guy-O dished out $200,000 on a high-class spread including bottles of pink Krug champagne and Crack Baby vodka and champagne cocktails.

Guy knows how to do it big! Get the ole’ beotch drunk! That’s probably the only way Guy can get Madonna to allow him to sleep in her bed at night, instead of the couch! Smart man!

Madonna and Guy’s marriage may be on the rocks, but what better thing to do to improve a relationship than by adopting an orphan? Umm…hello…if St. Angelina and Brad can do it…why can’t Madonna? Madonna is ALMOST saint-like, right?

Officials have confirmed the star has resumed her bid to adopt a second Malawian child, and has already visited the girl in the home country of her son David.

Malawian adoption minister Penstone Kilembe told a source: ‘Madonna’s representatives have been visiting the girl.

‘The adoption is now advanced - the government is waiting for Madonna to forward the petition of adoption formalities.’

So, apparently another girl may be added to the Ritchie clan. I wonder what Guy thinks about this! Just another child support payment if a divorce occurs! Show me the MONEY!

Could Minnie Driver be using her baby’s mystery papa as a publicity stunt? I know, what a horribly horrendous thing to do, right? I don’t even know if Papa Joe Simpson or even Madonna, the “Queen of Media Manipulation” would stoop to that level…okay, maybe MADONNA would…girlfriend has no shame. And well…maybe Papa Joe would too, for all we know. He is kind of a slimy sneaky fox like that. But, would you expect that from innocent Minnie Driver? Well, you’d be surprised. The quiet, innocent ones are USUALLY the ones to look out for.

It is obvious Minnie’s career as an actress died like TEN years ago…and her singing career is like Shaquille O’Neils rapping career…it pretty much never happened. So, out of desperation to get some decent movie roles, do you think Minnie would go out on a limb here and order up a pity party? Heck, are we even sure there IS a baby in that belly? Or perhaps, she’s trying to play up the missing-baby-papa in order to hopefully gain more attention and earn more money off baby’s first photo shoot? There are so many possible scenarios here…

That sneaky Minnie. I always knew something was fishy about her. It really IS all about the money, isn’t it?!

I don’t.

For $30,000 you CAN have Madonna’s face.

I personally am not a big fan of sunken-in cheeks with what looks to be acorns packed up in the upper cheek bones. It’s just not appealing, unless of course you are a squirrel. And, I’m pretty sure Madonna is not part-squirrel. If she starts shelling acorns with her teeth, I will become concerned.

Apparently, cosmetic surgeons adore Madonna’s face and have named it the “New New Face”…which is supposedly a “high honor” in the name of cosmetic surgery. (Even though Madonna denies having plastic surgery, of course.) Yay for Madonna.

According to a source, Dr. Rosenberg used Meg Ryan as an example of the ‘Old New Face’, saying, “‘Meg may think she looks beautiful, but what we are picking up on is a sense that maybe there is an over-inflation of the lips, there’s an over-abundance of fillers in her face.”

Yeah Meg, take the hint, Dr. Rosenberg thinks your ugly. Heart-shape-faced squirrels are the “in” thing THESE days! The Olsen twins were also named as having the “New New” faces. Well, yippie freakin’ doo.

So, remember that peeps…next time you get cosmetic work done on your face, just ask for the “heart-shape-faced-squirrel look”, aka. the Madonna and the surgeons will LOVE you.

But, will you LOVE YOU?

These days, 50-year-old Sharon Stone is digging her claws young pups. Sharon Stone is the latest celebrity female to join the Cougar-licious club by dating a man at least 10 years her junior. And, to that I say, ROCK ON!

The Basic Instinct star raised eyebrows and turned some heads as she showed up with a mystery baby boy at designer pal Christian Audigier’s Caribana Saturday party in a Toronto nightclub. According to a source, Sharon and her boy toy partied into the wee hours of the night.

After the fabulous party, I am sure the mystery man rubbed Ben Gay all over Sharon’s back and feet before she tucked him into bed. How romantic!

Click after the jump to see pics of other cougar-licious celebrity mamas.
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Those video cameras seen taping the Britster busting some dance moves with a mystery male (while in Mexico)may be part of what we could see on the boob tube. Yeppers, Britney may be coming to reality television.

According to a source, “Britney’s bodyguards and other staff members have been told to carry video equipment with them wherever they go so they don’t miss a thing. Whether Britney is high or low, feeling happy or sad, the cameras are there catching it all.

Britney thinks a new reality show is just the thing she needs to help her kick start her career and prove to her fans she has put her recent troubles behind her.”

A little gyration with Madonna on Madonna’s Sticky and Sweet tour…a new album and a possible reality show? Hmmm…

Just as we thought would happen…and you KNOW the ratings would be sky high on a Britney reality show! Whether you’d like to admit it, you’d have yourself a little look-sy.

C’mon…you KNOW you would watch it!

*If this is TRUE, let’s hope Britney explains this picture of her little boo boo playing with her cigarettes! Yikes!

Alvin, Simon, Theodore, and…Madonna? Odd name for a chipmunk, I know, right? But, Madonna sure has the look down!

Madonna was spotted out and about NYC once again leaving a Kabbalah center. (First photo, NOT the second one.) Girlfriend looked a tad stressed (hmmm, wonder why?) or either that she has QUITE a few acorns packed and tucked up in her upper cheeks.

Winter is approaching, but not for at least another three to four months from now. Unless…Madonna is planning to go into hibernation a tad bit earlier this year? Hmmm…

Madonna may be going through a lot right now…being accused of an affair with one of baseball’s top dogs …her marriages in shambles…and her childhood/pre-Guy Richie-life exposed by her own (brother)…but Madonna isn’t shying away from cameras. Oh, no SHE isn’t!

In fact, Madonna is doing quite the opposite, spending quality Kabbalah time with Guy Richie and kiddies and exercise time with BFF Gwyneth Paltrow. Yesterday, Gwyneth and Madonna were spotted out and about in the Hamptons with a couple of their rug rats.

Gwynnie Gwin Gwin can make it all better.

This weekend…

New York Yankees vs. Toronto Blue Jays…

The picture says it all.

Getting texted for the very first time…
Like a schooool boy.
To see your number, come up on mine….
Cellphone. Ahhhh.

Payback is a bitch and certainly just may be one in the A-Rod-Madonna scandal. Apparently there are some pretty raunchy text messages on A-Rod’s phone FROM Madonna and Cynthia (A-Rod’s soon-to-be-ex-wife) has copies of these alleged texts. A pal of Alex told a source how he acted like a “smitten schoolboy” as he swapped texts.

But, remember folks…it was NOTHING sexual. Just like…Bill Clinton did NOT have sexual relations with that woman.

Ha! I can’t wait for this to get nasty.