Because when a marriage is on the road to destruction, the best thing to do is get knocked up, right? Not that Katie Price and Peter Andre are completely dunzo, but man oh man have those rumors been floating around in the cyberworld. Katie Price tried to prove her marriage wasn’t in trouble by flying out to Los Angeles to join her man for a few photo ops. And just today, Katie took her presumed publicity stunt one step further.

Katie Price has officially announced to the world that she plans on having more rug rats with her greasy hubby Peter Andre. Those poor kids have not even been conceived yet and I already feel sorry for them. Is that wrong?

Katie told Ok! Magazine, “I want to have another three kids biologically and then adopt, but if something happened and there was a child who needed a home before that, then I’d do it.”

Hmmmm. These two remind me of Madge and Guy all over again. Barf.

Image Source: David Dyson

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Hey, it’s the we-still-love-each-other-look-at-us-and-take-our-picture photo op! Peter Andre and Katie Price reunited for lunch at paparazzi hot spot the Ivy in Los Angeles looking forcibly happy.

These two need a freakin’ clue. If you are going to try to make your marriage look like everything is hunky dory, at least make the photo op believable.

How much longer until a divorce announcement?

Image Source: Splash

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Glamazon Katie Price made her arrival at LAX airport an entrance of desperation as she flashed her wedding ring for all to see. Barf.

The caked-on-makeup-fake-boobied children’s book author has been the subject of much speculation that a divorce is near with husband Peter Andre. But, Katie decided the best way to solve this rumor was to Minnie Mouse the situation.

Katie sported a Minnie Mouse t-shirt and spider-like eyelashes that was sure to bring smiles and cheer to all who see her. Does Andre have a mouse fetish we aren’t yet aware of?

She did forget the bow though. The bow would be enough to save any marriage.

Image Source: Splash

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Apparently Madge isn’t playing very nice in this divorce to Guy Ritchie and quite frankly I expected some real nastiness to take over Madge’s charming personality. “Madonna has been taunting Guy Ritchie with dozens of weird text messages. Director Guy, 40, showed crew on the set of his latest film Sherlock Holmes one which read: ‘You’re going down.’ He said he found his estranged wife’s behavior odd, but that he is used to it by now. And he confided in one pal: ‘This is her idea of a joke – but it’s not funny. Imagine what it was like living with her.’” Can you just picture what Madge’s veiny, sunk-in face probably looked like when she sent these text messages? Yikes!

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With a pose like this, it is clear Nick Cannon is happy. I mean, do you freakin’ blame him? His bank account has nearly quadrupled in funds. And, his Z-list fame has risen to that of an A-lister as a result of his marriage to the greatest singer in all the land, Miss Mariah Carey. However…despite the whirlwind marriage and the true love Mariah has supposedly found in Nick, the pop/R & B diva DID have second thoughts about marrying the young pup.

Mariah told a source, “You know what, I did. But he doesn’t act like it (younger) - he’s really very intelligent. He’s a very business-minded person, but he’s also a lot of fun so you don’t really think about those things. It is what it is. I’ve been with someone older and that could be a disaster or maybe you have to throw that side away and don’t think about it - think about who’s right for you.” she added.

As of late, millionaire Mariah and her young hubby have been attending several high profile events, including their most recent appearance at the 2008 Whitney Museum of American Art Gala in NYC on Monday.

It’s definitely the good life for Nicky! He better be good to her, otherwise M’s lambs will go unleashed. You can bet your wooly booty on that!

Click after the jump for more pics of MC and Nick at the Art Gala.
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“There are lots of things about England that I love, but my husband isn’t one of them.”
–Madonna reportedly told a friend.

Ouch.

Image Source: Photo by Brendan Beirne / Rex Features

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Are you thinking that the A-Rod-Madge affair didn’t happen? Well, bitches, it’s time to start snapping out of your denial funk and face reality. Even if it wasn’t physical, you can bet your booty it was an “affair of the heart”. What a difficult time for Madonna, this big divorce and all. So, what better way to deal with the tragedy of a divorce than to spend some time speaking with a REALLY good friend?

Poor Alex knows that this is a difficult time for Madonna, especially as she has children and the fact that he went through the SAME ORDEAL just a few months back.

Apparently the RIGHT answer in helping out his REALLY good friend is by purchasing a penthouse just a few blocks away from the pop superstar in NYC. Ummm yeah. THAT should make everything alright.

A source said, “He thought this was the best way to be close to her without being too intrusive. He is completely into her and willing to be patient while she sorts everything out. All he cares about is just being close to her,” a source added.

In addition, Rodriguez has also promised a gift to Madge and her vadge of a his-and-hers gym complex near her Manhattan apartment. What a perfect gift! We all know how much Madge LOVES to work on building up her pipes!

Wow. What a great friend she has in A-Rod! That is just the person she needs to hang out with now to help mend her broken heart. Pffffft.

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For those of you who didn’t know and who give a rat’s ass, Madonna is a beotch. I’m sorry but I totally feel sorry for Guy Ritchie in this divorce case. She’s a douche bag, he’s a douche bag. Thus, two douches equal either a perfect union or a tragic ending.

Well, all I can tell you is that this divorce is already getting nasty and the truth is coming out as Your Madgesty and One-Eyed Guy’s camps are mudslinging fools!

Not only was Madonna’s Kabbalah obsession an issue for Mr. Guy, but so was her DAILY insistence on sticking to a grueling four-hour exercise routine…so much so that Madge cut Guy OFF from the Madge Vadge! Oh the cruelty!

According to a source, Madonna’s strict regime reportedly meant the couple went for 18 months without making love. When they did find time to make love, it was like ‘cuddling up to a piece of gristle’, Ritchie is said to have told friends.

Yikes!

So what does Guy think about Madge’s buff bod? Well, Madge is alleging he would tell her that she really should give up the live touring and that she looked like a…wait for it…granny….!!!

Wowsers! Can you believe the low blow!?! GRANNY!!!! This is gonna get real bad.

Madonna, on the other hand, Madonna has rambled on to a friend,

“I’m totally devastated that Guy’s turned out to be such a gold-digger. I thought we’d been on a spiritual journey together for the past ten years — but obviously I was wrong. He’s just after my money. I’ve worked my ass off for the last 30 years to get what I have, and now this gold-digger wants to take it from me. Kabbalah philosophy teaches that you don’t take what you haven’t earned. Well that’s exactly what Guy is doing. He hasn’t earned a penny of it, yet wants to take, take, take.

He keeps upping his demands — he just wants more, and more, and more from me. It’s unbelievable.”

Wowsers. Stay tuned for the war of words to unfold…

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As rumors fly that Katie Price’s marriage is crumbling, the best way to dispel those rumors are to go out on the town sans your husband….get completely wasted…and forget to wear your ring. That will fix things! Ummm…not.

Katie denies a split telling a source that at one point they did split (for a few days), but, she insists the pair have overcome their troubles. She told OK magazine: “We’re in love for God’s sake. We are not breaking up.”

So, is this just an innocent girl’s night out or is Katie trying to escape from a marriage that is hanging by a thread?

Image Source: BIG

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And yet ANOTHER celebrity marriage is crumbling apart…THAT of Tea Leoni and recovering sex addict David Duchovny. Well, we already knew Tea and David were experiencing some rocky times due to David’s addiction to sexy time. Tea gave David an ultimatum…get your butt to rehab and work out your sexual problems or forget about our life together. And David did just that.

However, it seems there has been another dagger thrown in the heart here. It seems Tea may not be as angelic and innocent as we all assume. Are ya ready for some real dirty dirty dirt?!!! Well…

According to a source, David Duchovny was doing a little snooping on Tea’s cell phone only to discover some pretty explicit text messages from actor Billy Bob Thornton. WHOOODEEEEWHOOOO!!!

So, how long has this been going on? Well, apparently, Tea met Thornton on set of a film they worked on together earlier this year. So, perhaps there was a lot more going on than we know….

In any case, this sucks for Tea and David’s two kids. They are the ones who suffer when marriages go sour. There has been no announcement of a divorce.

Image Source: Reuters

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