Whatever Heather Locklear went to rehab for obviously didn’t help. Saturday Heather was pulled over in the city of Santa Barbara by a California Highway Patrol officer for “driving erratically”.

According to a source, Heather was not under the influence of alcohol, but rather prescription pain meds. Heather was booked and later released. Perhaps she took one too many “happy” pills. Those can often times bite you in the booty. So does this mean rehab stint number two for Ms. Locklear?

“It’s news to me. He didn’t seem any more or less horny than anyone I worked with.”
—David Duchovny’s writer pal Matt Dearborn, commenting exclusively to E! News about the actor’s recent exit to sex addiction rehab

and a lot of it…so much so that he must’ve gotten caught with his panties down. Tea Leoni, his wife, probably forced him to check into rehab for that shiz or he was going to be out on the freakin’ street. So in rehab he sits! For sex addiction!

“I have voluntarily entered a facility for the treatment of sex addiction,” Duchovny said in a statement released Thursday by his attorney, Stanton “Larry” Stein. “I ask for respect and privacy for my wife and children as we deal with this situation as a family.”

Let’s hope David gets his testosterone in check!

Apparently Tila Tequila’s new fling Courtney Semel has a bit of history with our friend Lindsay Lohan.

Yeppers. BIG HISTORY, actually.

The cat is outta the bag. Or in the bag. Or in more than one bag. Who knows, really. All of this sounds like a scene out of Days Of Our Lives, minus the possessed midget.

It is rumored that Samantha Ronson ISN’T Lindsay’s first lesbian relationship.

One of Courtney Semel’s friends sold her story to The Sun and revealed some very juicy details about Lindsay and Courtney’s LESBIAN relationship.

“Everyone thinks Samantha is Lindsay’s first lesbian love, but we were very passionate until her fear of being found out drove us apart,” Courtenay told a pal. “At the time she was terrified her career would be over if she revealed her sexual tendencies. But then Samantha came on to the scene and Courtney was dumped.”

In order to “hide” her secret love for women, Lindsay started getting heavy into drugs and sleeping with men. Mmmhmm.

Courtenay’s pal explained: “She met Lindsay in the summer of 2006 at a party in Malibu.
From the start Lindsay was very confused about her feelings for Courtenay so did more and more drugs to stifle the sexual attraction she was experiencing. But eventually she just gave in and at every party they’d kiss and touch each other in the corner. It’s a miracle nobody found out. Both of them would do lines of cocaine in the toilets then head home and fall into bed together.”

While Lindsay made her highly publicized trip to Promises rehab center, both Samantha AND Courtney paid Lindsay visits. Lindsay the lesbian playa!

Once Lindsay got out of rehab and back into the public eye, Lindsay and Courtney had moved in together, sharing a home in Beverly Hills. Lindsay had a strong relationship with Courtney, however she was still afraid to publicly show her true feelings as a lezbo. Her partying ways were undeniable and her public image too important to her.

“But still Lindsay brought men back,” the pal added. “Courtenay would throw fits of rage, writing her hundreds of angry e-mails from another room in the house. The sexual attraction between them was electric though and they’d still kiss and make up.”

It was apparently all too much for Courtney and she ended moving out of the Beverly Hills home the two shared. And, that was that. Samantha was in like flynn.

Wow. I wonder what made Lindsay change her mind with Samantha? Is she just afraid of being alone? Or was she just keeping Samantha on the back burner?

Lord help us all! That is all we need is a bunch of little Wino-Fielder-Civil rats running around.

Amy told a source, “I want at least five kids,’ she said. ‘I want twins. Blake is gonna be the most amazing dad.”

What the heck is this chick smoking? I don’t know what world she is living in, but she sure has a distorted sense of reality.

Let’s hope Amy changes her mind about procreating with this jail bird and gets herself some help in REHAB. Hey, if Britney Spears can do it, there is HOPE for Wino!

Save Wino! Save Wino! Save Wino!

This is why taking drugs is bad for you, kiddies! It messes you up BIG TIME! Check out Steve-O’s rant from his Myspace page.

Hello Everyone,

After seeing “Dr. Drew’s Celebrity Addiction Special” on VH1 News, I figured it was time to put something out there for you all. I expected my part on that show to be much harder to watch than it wound up being. It made me want to explain a little bit of what I’ve been going through since I got clean, to help some of you understand how much damage drugs and alcohol have really done to me. I’ve now been clean for 115 days, and I’m, again, in a mental institution. I did so much cocaine, ketamine, pcp, nitrous oxide, and all sorts of other drugs, that, quite simply, my brain is fucked up. As you can probably tell by the way I’m writing this, my cognitive skills are alright, but, I frequently suffer from horrible mood swings and severe depression. Those of you who have followed my warped mind’s trail on the Internet for a significant amount of time have, I’m sure, been very aware of those attributes, but, I just want you all to know that four fucking months (almost) of not touching a damn thing that a psychiatrist didn’t perscribe to me hasn’t changed that shit. The medication that is prescribed to me doesn’t do the trick every day, let’s just put it that way. I’m back in the looney bin trying to get that shit right. The bottom line is that doing drugs fucked my ass up and I’m going to be paying for it for a long time, probably for the rest of my life. Everyone’s going to make their own decisions in life, but nobody needs to make the same mistakes I made. I love you all,

Steve-O

Wowsers…is this THE same Steve-O? Sounds like he has started to get some common sense. Good for him! We wish him well in his recovery.

Sometimes shit does hit the fan and well, Amy Winehouse does too (hit fans, that is). The other night at Glastonbury was a rough one for Amy Winehouse. While performing, she moved into the crowd and someone messed with her beehive. Note to fans: Do NOT mess with Amy’s beehive. Period. She WILL kick your butt.

James Gostelow was the recipient of a big ole’ slug from the troubled singer. Here’s how it went down, according to Jim.

He told the BBC: “I saw a hat being thrown from behind me and it hit Amy’s beehive.
She looked down, saw me looking up, and her elbow went for me.
He added: “At the end of the day it is all part of being at the front and being pushed by thousands of people. It is all part of the Glastonbury experience. I’m just pleased I got to see her. She did a great act. Not everyone can say they have been hit by Amy Winehouse. I just want to shake the hand of the person who threw the hat.”

Good thing he liked it. However, Amy needs more than just rehab. She needs ANGER management as well. I’d like to see a good scuffle between Amy and Naomi Campbell. That would be an interesting brawl to say the least.

According to a source, Amy Winehouse WILL be returning back to rehab. Good lawd, let’s HOPE this is true and that Amy goes through with this. This chick needs something, anything at this point. Shoot, this girl might need a vacation out at Mel Gibson’s ranch. It’s done Britney some good. I don’t know what is out at that ranch, but it just might do Amy some good too.

Supposedly, Amy’s people spoke to a renowned Israeli institution and an Israeli professor who conducts a very special and effective method.

“She has requested to come to him to do this method, since it’s a method that is suitable for her.” What is he dangling some crack from a carrot in front of her nose or something? I don’t see her REQUESTING to go to this guy unless he’s got something good.

Andre Waismann, who will treat Amy, said: “All of my patients are discharged healthy and no longer dependent.

“There is a misunderstanding about drug addiction. People think it is a social and psychological problem, but it’s a neurological problem.”

Well, in any case, let’s hope this works…otherwise Plan B may be to have Papa Winehouse step up and give Mel a call. Mel may be the new go-to guy!

Could Nick Carter’s little bro be heading to rehab? Rumors have been going around that Aaron Carter may be checking himself into Dr. Drew’s Celebrity Rehab. Too much wacky tabacky can definitely be a cause for concern!  Put DOWN the bag of Doritoes and get your booty to rehab if that is what it takes.

According to the New York Post, stars who may seize the opportunity to get some help include pop singer Aaron Carter, basketball star Dennis Rodman, Skid Row musician Sebastian Bach and former madam Heidi Fleiss. Although some of these names could clearly benefit from the program, VH1 would not comment on any of the casting rumors. Production on the next season of Rehab is scheduled to begin in June.

I hate to sound cliche, but this show is addicting. The only thing is, is that I wish the viewers could pick who they wanted to see on the show.  Wouldn’t that be HOT?  I think I’d have the best cast of celebs.

Wouldn’t you love to see Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, Dennis Rodman, Amy Winehouse, Pete Doherty, DMX and Kate Moss all in one house together?  How INSANE would that be?! Poor Dr. Drew would probably start smoking a little of the wacky tabacky himself after dealing with that HOT MESS!

Papa Winehouse has seen and heard enough of what his daughter Amy is doing to herself and others. According to a source, Mitch Winehouse strongly believes that rehab is not the answer for his druggie daughter, but rather, a forced lockup in a mental facility.

He told the source, “I’ve been on the phone to Amy’s manager in Los Angeles and he’s starting things rolling. They are going to be speaking to doctors, psychologists and everything else.” Mitch went on to say, “You need all four—the psychologists, the doctor, the local health authority and the next of kin—all to decide that somebody is sectionable. Now is the time to exert whatever pressure we have to try to do it.”

Yes, yes, yes! Finally, SOMEONE is thinking! Hopefully this does follow through and Amy gets the help she really needs…BEFORE it gets any worse.