
Dick Van Dyke marries longtime girlfriend Arlene Silver.
Somewhere up in heaven in inappropriate white lingerie, Anna Nicole Smith is looking down and smiling approvingly from ear to ear.
In a stunning move that will have true gold-diggers questioning their commitment to the game, actor Dick Van Dyke (coincidentally, the perfect porn star name) married his girlfriend of the past six years, Arlene Silver. As a makeup artist, perhaps she is able to apply enough MAC on the both of them that they can meet halfway with each of them looking as if they are in their 60s?
Because Dick Van Dyke is old, people. Not Janice Dickinson old, not John McCain old, not even Clint Eastwood old. Dick Van Dyke has all of them beat. At 86, I’m wondering why he didn’t marry her sooner? It’s not like time is on his side! There are not even enough months in the year to term this romance, because “May-December” does not do this 46 year age gap justice. Looks like Arlene has been at play in the fields of the octogenarians!
If Dick is working, perhaps there’s a baby Dyke in their future!