Posts Tagged ‘doot doot’

Ryan Seacrest Thinks Britney Is Knocked Up?

Wednesday, April 29th, 2009

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Normally you would think Ryan Seacrest would be in-the-know when it comes to gossip. I mean, he’s GOT the inside connections. However, just recently Ryan revealed revealed that he had been told by a ‘reliable source’ some news that was sure to shock us all into Cheeto oblivion.

Ryan reportedly said that the Cheetostar was preparing for a new arrival. Yes…as in knocked up…sperminated…”with child”…expecting…

So, is there another doot doot on the way for Brit Brit? Nahhhhh. Says Britney’s spokesman Adam Leber, “She’s absolutely not pregnant. I have no idea where this ridiculous rumor came from. Ryan has communication with our camp and could have checked this before saying it.”

A good question would be WHY WOULD Ryan say something if he didn’t know for sure, especially when he could have even asked Brit Brit herself? That is a question many industry sources are said to be confused about.

“Ryan and Britney are friends. He wouldn’t have said something like that unless he knew the truth.”

Just one question…did Ryan NOT see the cotton-pony-on-the-loose video? If I am mistaken, cotton pony time=failed little swimmers.

Brad Paisley Is A Proud Papa

Sunday, April 19th, 2009

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It’s about freakin’ time Brad Paisley’s woman pops out that little doot doot of hers. Kimberly and Brad became proud parents of a baby boy on Friday.

The baby was due to pop out the night of the Academy of Country Music Awards on April 5th, however, this little guy didn’t arrive until two weeks later!

Papa Brad commented on the baby waiting game experience. “There’s nothing we can do about it. Well, there is, but we’re not doing that.”

And, two-year-old big brother Huck was having a hard time believing the baby was showing up either. “I think maybe Huck’s not buying it anymore. We keep saying, ‘You’re going to be a big brother,’ and I sense he’s like, ‘Yeah, right! They’re full of crap!’”

Needless to say, we are happy that the little babe has finally arrived!

Madge’s Baby Snatching Case Put Off Until Friday

Monday, March 30th, 2009

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Madge continued her baby adoption mission yesterday with a trip to Malawi. The Angelina-wanna-be arrived with daughter Lourdes, Rocco and David in tow and their private jet landing in the capital of Lilonwe.

Today Madge asked a judge in Lilongwe for permission to adopt four-year-old Mercy James as a ’sister’ for David, however, the judge is making the baby snatcher wait…until FRIDAY! Whhhaaaaaa?!! Why?

Well, it seems like Mercy’s memaw-maw is causing a big ole stink at the prospect of Madge adopting this little doot doot, who has been living as an orphan FOR YEARS!

Ummm, that totally does not make any sense.

“We feel Madonna is behaving like a bully,” said Undule Mwakusungura, chairman of the Human Rights Consultative Committee. “She has the money and the status to use her profile to manipulate, to fast-track the process.”

Ya damn right she does…Madge has the ching to buy all of Malawi if she wants. Step aside, Undule! Let Madge fly the jet right up to the orphanage, put “Holiday” on the jet’s speaker system and allow Madge to snatch all the Malawian babies she can fit in her private jet. Heck, maybe Madge could adopt crabby pants Undule too!

Halle Berry Preggers?

Wednesday, February 25th, 2009

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Halle Berry and her man super hottie Gabriel Aubry were in attendance at the Oscars looking fabulous and very much in tune to each other. I have to ask…did you happen to see that little bump Halle was sporting? Hmmmm? Perhaps a little unprotected genetalia bumping has taken place.

The fact that Halle and Gabriel were pictured coming outside of a fertility clinic a few weeks back makes ya kind of wonder. So, does that mean the two are trying again for another little doot doot?

I mean, little baby Nadya IS almost one year old, so I suppose it is about time for another little spermination to happen. Don’t you think?

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What do you think? Is Halle pregnant? And while we are on the subject of spermination, I suppose it is about time for Xtina to get knocked up again too. Time to put on your bump watch goggles, bitches!

Image Source: Wire Image


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